sometimes, people don’t understand that we are hated for being autistic. “But I don’t hate autistic people!”.
That’s right! Because you don’t know how autistic people are.
You know, people never bullied me for being autistic. Because neither me nor they had the terminology. Nah, they punished me for being weird. And what made me weird to their eyes? I spoke weird and often stumbled, and I spoke like a grownup anyway, and I wouldn’t shut up about Ancient Greece. I moved weird too, because I was (am) really clumsy, and I didn’t have any friends. I was boring and didn’t catch jokes (made at my expense) and I didn’t look them in the eye, and so on and on.
If you asked any of the people who bullied me for years whether they hate autistic people, they’d say “no!”. Because they don’t hate autistic people, but oh boy do they hate weird people. Perhaps they don’t hate autistic people, but surely they hated me for being obviously autistic.
I’ve been trying to explain this concept to a lot of people. You did a really good job summing it up.
ive seen people online claim to support autistic people and then kind of mock/ostracize others for not immediately picking up on all the unwritten online social rules
[Image: Screencap from the above website; you can click through to read the whole thing, but I’m going to copy-paste this same bit because it answers so many questions in my life - mostly related to “Why am I crying about this?”]
Rejection sensitive dysphoria
(RSD) is an extreme emotional sensitivity and emotional pain triggered
by the perception – not necessarily the reality – that a person has been
rejected, teased, or criticized by important people in their life. RSD
may also be triggered by a sense of failure, or falling short – failing
to meet either their own high standards or others’ expectations.
Dysphoria is Greek for “difficult to bear.” It’s not that people with
ADHD are wimps, or weak; it’s that the emotional response hurts them
much more than it does people without the condition.
When this emotional response is internalized, it can
imitate full, major depression complete with suicidal ideation. The
sudden change from feeling perfectly fine to feeling depressed that
results from RSD is often misdiagnosed as rapid cycling bipolar
disorder.
It can take a long time for physicians to recognize that these symptoms
are caused by the sudden emotional changes associated with ADHD and
rejection sensitivity, while all other object relations are totally
normal.
When this emotional response is externalized, it looks
like an impressive, instantaneous rage at the person or situation
responsible for causing the pain. 50% of people who are assigned
court-mandated anger-management treatment have previously unrecognized
ADHD.
Capslock translation from above: “Wow Im so glad my doctor told me about this” said none of us ever
One more reblog for the road. I’ve seen at least eight people go “There’s a name for this?” as a result of sharing this link, and I want to try and reach even more. It’s so meaningful to me to know that there’s something going on, and that it’s not just me being inadequate at dealing with my emotions. When you consider the level of horror I feel over even minor screwups, my reactions are completely understandable. My feelings are valid.
For anyone else out there who cries over spilled milk, or at the drop of a hat? This might be worth a read.
This is your irregular reminder that Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria Is A (terrible, horrible, no good, very bad) Thing.
Alternately, this is your notice that There’s A Name For That Horrible Experience.
Support to all of my fellow ADHD-ers out there; RSD is made of terrible.
Oh look, it me.
I have ADHD and BPD and this is so relatable
Oh my gods this makes so much more sense now
Rebloging again to raise awareness for my fellow adhders
I probably should actually check if I have ADHD it rings way too many bells